5 Reasons Students Are Best Suited To Survive a Zombie Apocalypse
We’ve all been there. One minute you’re a coffee-fuelled machine who’s breezing through your fourth all-nighter in a row trying to meet all of your never-ending deadlines, then BAM. You go to take one hard-earned 10 minute power nap and the next thing you know you find yourself being resurrected from what could probably be clinically classed as a coma.
So, whilst you’ve probably fallen slightly behind with The Walking Dead, at least you can be pretty certain that being a student gives you an automatic advantage should a zombie apocalypse arise.
Not convinced? Here’s the proof.
1. All those walks of shame, last-minute all-nighters and drunk stumbles home have given you a lot of practice at imitating and confusing any zombie attackers.
2. If you find yourself at a loss when it comes to acquiring traditionally useful weapons, you can always use that poisonous paint-stripper you like to call “vodka”.
Because seriously now, does anyone actually know where their cutlery disappears to?
3. You’re used to eating around the mouldy bits and making do with ever-so-slightly congealed milk in your tea, so there’s no real worry about having to make food last.
4. Everyone in Tesco is used to seeing your disgraceful self trying to buy a bottle of wine en route to your night out.
Which means there’ll be no big surprises when you’re furiously ransacking the poor place for supplies.
5. And if you do get bitten and forced into quarantine, you’re more than comfortable in isolation.
It’ll be just like the good old days of leaving an essay quite late and watching 10 series of a TV show in two days.