7 Steps To Surviving Valentine’s Day When You’re Single
The commercial love in the air is a bit overwhelming at the moment, even if you are in a happy relationship. From coloured candies to heart-shaped pizzas (apparently that’s a thing now?!), we are all being subjected to the sickly sweet build-up to Valentine’s Day.
For those of you that are single, it can progress from being vaguely annoying to downright offensive. This guide will help you cope this February, so that you make it past the 14th without murdering everyone around you in a Valentine’s-induced fit of rage.
Avoid talking to all friends in a relationship for the next few days. Even those that claim to be boycotting the 14th. To them, boycotting it likely means that they will have a romantic dinner at home with their partner, before snuggling up on the sofa to watch Moulin Rouge. They will probably also get each other hilarious cards with monkeys on them. In any case, coupled up friends will not be able to stop talking about their V-Day plans, which will either irritate you or it will make you a little jealous.
Stop checking your emails or, if you can’t do that, block all the random email newsletters you have signed up to in order to get a random discount at some point or another (hiya ASOS). They are all full of ‘wonderful’ Valentine’s Day deals, that you just have to know about. It’s annoying, unnecessary and it clogs up your inbox.
Try to avoid Facebook, Twitter and other social media accounts. Again, some people will struggle to do this (although a detox might be what you need, you addict). In that case, be brutal and unfriend/unfollow the ones that profess their love for their other half to the internet, upload pictures of the presents they have received or mention the lovely meal/film they are about to enjoy. That kind of chat means they are no longer good enough to be your virtual friend.
Also stay away from the television. Romantic films and TV show episodes will plague the screen, and while the odd one might be enjoyable, too many will make you want to vomit on your coffee table. The horror movie selection on Netflix is now your best friend.
Don’t arrange a blind/first date for Valentine’s Day. It’s honestly a bit sad, and, let’s face it, who has ever heard of a successful relationship starting that way? Say no to Tinder, it’s just not the answer.
Do arrange to spend time with other single friends, colleagues and family members. Whether you stay in and watch a (preferably gory) movie, or hit the town, you will have more fun with other people. Alcohol-intake is advisable in either of these situations.
Hungover or not, rejoice on the 15th of February, for you won’t have to deal with this Valentine’s nonsense for a whole other year.
See you on the other side.