35 Times You Regretted Studying In London
Because despite what you see on Made in Chelsea, it isn’t always glitz and glamour…
1. When you struggled to understand the tube map but knew better than to ask a local for help.
2. Whenever you spoke on the tube and someone looked like they wanted to kill you.
3. Every time you used public transport at rush hour and experienced inappropriate contact with a stranger.
4. Or couldn’t control your panic when you had to get off at the next stop but had no room to move.
5. When you realised that hell hath no fury like accidentally bumping into someone down a busy London road.
6. Whenever you went shopping down Oxford street at the weekend and had to navigate your way through this.
7. When you went on a night out at the weekend and the bar tender said it was £9 for a double vodka and coke.
8. When you discovered what Mayfair really was beyond the expensive square on the Monopoly board.
An area of night clubs funded by rich young men where girls can drink for free?
9. When you went to Leicester square at night and got harassed by promoters.
10. When you saw all your friends at Campus universities enjoying £1 a pint nights.
11. When this place was your closest alternative to that.
12. And then every time you looked and felt like this after a night out in Moonies.
13. When you were secretly devastated that it got closed down.
14. When you got on a bus and realised you had no money on your oyster card.
15. When you consequently got kicked off the bus, because there is no such thing as a sympathetic bus driver in London.
16. And if this happened after midnight you were literally stranded.
Because it’s surprisingly hard to find a 24-hour newsagents with an Oyster top-up service.
17. When you went to KCL and bumped into someone from UCL.
18. When you decided to take a module at another UOL university and instantly realised you weren’t welcome.
19. When your rent cost about three times more in London than it would in most other UK cities.
20. When it was apparently cheaper to commute from Barcelona to London than to actually live in London.
21. When you didn’t get your deposit back because your landlord was evil.
22. Or never got anything in your house fixed, because your landlord was evil.
23. When you came from the North and realised there was no Home Bargains in London.
24. When you realised it was not a 24-hour city like they say it is and pubs closed at 11pm.
Last orders at 10.30?
25. When you faced a queue this long to get into a club on a student night.
26. And faced an even longer queue to get to the bar once you were inside.
27. When you got to second year and realised there was no typical student housing area in London.
So socialising involved either persuading a friend to make a perilous journey miles outside their postcode or committing to that journey yourself.
28. When your friend got a man bun and you realised you’d lost them to Brixton.
29. Whenever you found yourself in Elephant and Castle alone by night.
30. When a friend came to stay and did not understand escalator etiquette.
31. When you were behind someone who waited until they were at the barriers to search for their oyster card.
32. When someone drunk tried to strike up conversation with you on the night bus.
33. Whenever anyone got in your way on your power walk to a lecture.
34. Whenever you encountered tourists.
Enjoying wandering around aimlessly whilst gawping at the London Eye are you?
35. And when you finally realised you’d turned into a rude Londoner.
Yet you will always defend London to anyone who criticises it, because despite its annoyances, nothing can take away the fact that it is one of most vibrant and historical cities in the world. Why would you want to study anywhere else?!