17 Stages of Writing a Dissertation Every Final Year Will Recognise
It’s been waiting for you for two years and now there’s no escaping it. Here are the all-too familiar stages you’ll experience when writing the dreaded dissertation:
1. You start out feeling optimistic – this could be pretty fun.
“It might be exciting having total control over this project,” you think.
2. This excitement quickly turns to confusion when you realise you have no idea what to do.
Having complete control over something is the opposite of fun.
3. Your “research” is initially just halfheartedly brainstorming until you get bored.
4. Reality sets in when your tutor asks you to present your ideas and you realise you have none.
Time to desperately bluff your way through another meeting.
5. You decide to trap yourself in the library with your books and convince yourself you’ll have a plan soon.
But you mainly just end up frustrated and grumpy.
6. Panicking, you try to calm yourself down and think about it logically.
It’s just 10,000 words, that’s like four normal essays. We’ve totally got this.
7. It’s getting stressful, so you take some “time off”, thinking you’ll soon feel refreshed and ready to write.
Only to realise that you’ve somehow fallen massively behind.
8. You then begin to feel insanely jealous of anyone who sounds vaguely ahead with their work.
Get your disgusting organisational skills out of my face.
9. The jealousy turns to anger as you complain about how unfair dissertations are to anyone who will listen.
They’re outdated and ridiculous, it’s like torture!
10. There comes a stage where either one of your friends is having a breakdown…
11. Or you are.
“Honestly, I just don’t think it can be done.”
12. The panicking worsens as you wonder how on earth you’re ever going to manage to meet the word count.
Who has enough ideas to write this many words?
13. You start to forget what the outside world looks like after months of being chained to your desk.
And mainly living off carbs and coffee.
14. As the final weeks approach, you have to remind yourself why you’re putting yourself through it all.
Repeat: you’ll get a degree out of this!
15. Eventually, you hit the dreaded editing phase as you re-read your work for what feels like the hundredth time.
Who thought that leaving all the editing until the last minute was a good idea?
16. Then finally, hand-in day arrives – freedom!
At this point you don’t even care anymore, you just want to throw your dissertation in the direction of your tutor and then run away into the sunset.