38 Things You’ll Only Remember If You Had Myspace
Strategic bulletin posting, top friends situating and learning how to use HTML codes – you can’t deny that Myspace was educational.
The classic Myspace is no more, with many users having lost all their old profiles and information. What better time to look back at how amazing (and often stressful) the old Myspace experience was, with these 38 much missed memories, the good and the bad:
1. Your myspace layout was one of the hardest decisions you ever had to make.
You spent hours making it look like this:
…only for minimalist and skinny profiles to become popular.
2. Top Friends politics: “Erm, why am I her number 6 when she’s my number 4?”
3. The original selfie: taken using a camera, in the bathroom, on a dirty mirror.
Tom from Myspace showing us how it’s done:
4. Being 99 years old.
5. “Sorry Mum, there’s no way I can go to bed until I find the right colour code for my links.”
6. Trawling through pages of bulletins to check if the person you like has posted anything since you were last online.
7. The panicked rush to pause the music on your friends’ profiles.
8. The closest thing to self-help you needed was freeweblayouts.net, hotfreelayouts.com and pimpmyprofile.com
9. Limiting the number of profile pics you had if you wanted to look really cool.
10. Having celebrity friends.
11. “Who wants to own this pic?”
12. “First you break up with me, then you take me off your Top Friends? Low.”
13. Spending your life wondering what an extended network was, and why absolutely everyone was in yours.
14. Being an expert at HTML.
15. “It says she’s been online today, so why hasn’t she replied to my comment?”
16. Perfecting your above-head camera angle in order to properly accentuate the size of your fringe.
17. Having **UNDER CONSTRUCTION** written on your profile when you were in the process of changing your layout.
18. Pic caption: “Keep or delete?”
19. Being too cool to share a chain bulletin, yet genuinely worrying that you will be single for the next 22 years because you didn’t.
20. Seeing this when you signed in:
21. Using scrollbars and dropdown menus in your Music section so that you could list every band you’ve ever listened to. Alphabetically.
22. ‘Who I’d Like to Meet’ – A section that was either disposed of or used as a desperate plea for a girlfriend/boyfriend.
23. Changing your entire profile colour scheme because you got a new default picture.
And actually enjoying it…
24. Adding someone you didn’t know because they were ‘hot’ and hoping they wouldn’t send you an ‘erm, who are you?’ comment.
25. Not-so-discreet indirect passive aggressive bulletin arguments.
26. Revealing top secret information about yourself in bulletin surveys.
27. Photobucket being your go-to website.
28. Feeling like the master of the internet when you figured out how to view people’s hidden friends and comments.
29. Getting layout envy when your friend updated their profile.
30. Spending hours choosing between these:
31. Skipping any song that didn’t make you look cool when doing iPod shuffle surveys.
32. Having friends write a paragraph about you for your ‘About Me’ section was completely normal.
33. At a friend’s house after school: “Can I just check my Myspace?“
34. The order of your top friends could make or break a friendship/relationship. Ranking was a strategic decision.
35. Flat out refusing to get Facebook. Facebook was for old people.
37. Having a trademarked name™
38. Searching for hours to find a cool profile song that no one else had (and that you probably didn’t really like).
Facebook just doesn’t compare.