39 Unavoidable Moments On The Road To a 2:1
Back in year 9 it was all about getting level 5s across the board, then came the five grade Cs and above for A-Levels, followed by the algorithm of UCAS points to get into that course you now occasionally turn up to. We then benefited from the sinecure of freshers with our 6 hours of seminars and tri-weekly hangovers and 40% pass requirement.
But now you’re in your final year and marching toward graduation day with only one thing in mind. Targeting a 2:1 is a stressful experience and some things are just unavoidable.
1. The Spring Semester Blues.
You’ve returned from your final extended Christmas holiday and realise that it’s just one short sprint to exam period.
2. “I’ll probably get a 2:1 then move to London and get a job.”
This also coincides with spending the break telling friends and families your concrete, guaranteed long-term plans.
3. You get your final timetable.
A nice reminder that you have one term left to learn 3 years of information.
4. And you regret all the modules you picked.
Italian Neorealism in Cinema sounded so much easier 2 months ago.
5. Second year drop-outs resurface.
Turns out that person who went AWOL in your second year group presentation is in your seminar again.
6. As does that one lecturer who took a disliking to you.
They gave you your first 2:2 and now you’ve got them again. Typical.
7. You work out your average grade.
Or at least you try to.
8. And spend more time doing this than actually working.
No matter how many times you do it the mark won’t change.
9. You finally agree to meet your dissertation supervisor.
10. Your housemate gets into the second round stage for a Graduate Scheme.
Blind-sided and confused, you just sit there like…
11. You Google “Graduate Scheme”.
After a 5 minute search you make a word document and save some companies and never look at it again.
12. “Any ideas for your dissertation yet?”
You have your second meeting with your dissertation tutor. The situation hasn’t improved.
13. Reading Week comes around and you convince yourself you’ll actually do some work.
If only life were that simple.
14. You desperately try to find a good place to study.
You clean your room, your desk, your housemate’s desk and cut the grass and the neighbour’s grass.
15. And eventually find the perfect place to work in the library…
Right by the vending machines.
16. You reach that point in life where you develop library rivals.
17. The all-nighters start to kick in.
It’s ok, I only need to write 2000 words by 4pm tomorrow.
18. Despite 3 years of being a student, you still manage to lose 3 hours and 500 words of work.
Ctrl + S
19. Spellcheck fails you.
After handing your essay in you realise there is a spelling error in the first sentence.
20. You learn that some of your modules have 50% exams and enter an immediate panic.
21. Which doesn’t end until you realise you have a 100% exam.
That’s it. Goodbye 2:1.
22. Your friend gets a 78 in their assignment.
And you’re so happy for them, obviously.
23. An email to students confirms that yes, final year is weighted 70/30 over second year.
That solitary 1st from second year shrinks into the ether.
24. You realise you haven’t been out in over a week.
25. You get a 69.
And freak out in front of your lecturer. “JUST ONE MORE. PLEASE!”
26. Multiple assignments come back as 2:1s and you walk around uni like a real scholar.
27. Then you get a 54.
And demand a remark from anyone who listens.
28. You add up your grade average again.
And subsequently lie to your friends and family about it.
29. Exams are closing in and you’re on a 2:1. Just.
30. The essays end. All that’s left is the exams.
You will never again in your life write a footnote, use Harvard referencing or quote a theorist. A small victory.
31. You treat yourself to post-essay drinks.
Meaning you all regress and drink from the noon essay deadline all the way through to 2 days before exams start.
32. You get your dissertation mark back.
Who’d have thought that thing you wrote a few months back would come out as a 64?
33. You buy post-it notes, a moleskin notebook, printer ink and coloured pens.
And subsequently cover your walls in Wordsworth quotes.
34. The Spring term ends and your lecturers disappear and rudely avoid your 2am revision help emails.
35. The exam fear sets in.
36. You spend what seems like an hour looking for your student ID number and the desk it is stuck to.
37. You feel sorry for the people who leave the exam after 30 minutes.
Didn’t I see you throw up on a bar once?
38. Results day comes around and you genuinely don’t know what’s going to happen.
But it all comes together. After all of those 8 hour coffee-fuelled revision binges and a day spent feverishly refreshing your uni website, you’ve got it.
39. Graduation day
Your last excuse to act like a Fresher. So you do. You earned it, right?