12 Thoughts You’ll Have In the Run Up To Christmas
Some of you might hate to admit it, and some of you might have embraced it long before Halloween decorations were even on supermarket shelves, but there is now no denying that Christmas is here.
No matter what your outlook is, there are some thoughts about the holiday season that are pretty much universal, and will probably take you across the entire spectrum of festive emotion, from Scrooge to Buddy the Elf and back again.
1. It doesn’t matter how prepared you think you are, Christmas just springs up on you out of nowhere.
“It’s here already? Where did the year go? I’m sure we only just took the decorations down from last Christmas…”
2. Christmas shopping: the highs
“Christmas shopping is so fun and festive! I love buying for people and imagining how happy they’ll be come Christmas morning!”
3. Christmas shopping: the lows
“Christmas shopping is the absolute bane of my existence. I am poor. People are rude. Shops are crowded and everything is ten times more expensive at this time of year! Can I get away with giving that person a £5 Amazon gift card?”
4. Love ‘em, or hate ‘em, Christmas songs are about to invade your eardrums with overwhelming persistence.
“No, Wizzard, I flipping DON’T wish it could be Christmas every day!”
5. Sometimes sitting down with mulled wine and writing Christmas cards isn’t as pleasant or festive as it sounds
“How many different ways are there to write ‘Merry Christmas’? If I write it the same way in every card are people going to think I haven’t put any effort in? Do I need to write an additional message, or will they be happy with just the seasonal greeting? How many kisses do I put for this person? Did I give the same card to that person last year? Do people even read these things?!”
6. The Christmas food is definitely a highlight
“Turkey, pigs in blankets, stuffing, Christmas pudding, chocolate yule log, alcohol… what more can I ask for?!”
7. That is, until the sprouts come out
“Do I really have to eat them, mum?”
8. When it comes to wrapping presents you wish there had been some kind of masterclass in school
“Curse you, spherical gift box that refuses to be wrapped neatly! And damn you, too, awkwardly shaped gift that won’t fit into a gift bag properly without poking out of the side!”
9. There’s nothing more annoying than screaming children visiting Santa’s Grotto… which happens to be set up in the middle of the shop you were hoping to visit.
“Oh, the temptation to tell them all he’s not real…”
10. Coffee shops suddenly get interesting.
“Black forest hot chocolate? Gingerbread latte?? Takeaway cups with Snowmen on them?! Don’t mind if I do!”
11. If you’re unfortunate enough to work in retail, you know how it feels to truly hate people.
“Can’t you do your shopping online instead? You’re killing my Christmas cheer!”
12. And finally, in true Christmas spirit, the highs and lows of getting to see your family again.
“Christmas family catch-ups are so happy and relaxing. Until the alcohol kicks in and the family drama kicks off. You know, I think I might have preferred it when we didn’t all see each other…”
Merry Christmas, ya filthy animals.