22 Things Every Student Secretly Wishes They Could Write In Their Uni Essays
If you could write what you were really thinking, you definitely would.
1. In this essay, I honestly have no idea what I’ll be writing about. At all.
2. Just wanted to warn you of that. I don’t want to get your hopes up, you see.
3. I do have a plan, but you probably won’t be able to tell. Mostly because I probably won’t follow it.
4. I only chose this question because it contributed the most words to the word count.
5. I’m really not sure what my point is here. Sorry.
6. Just because I don’t understand what I’m typing, that doesn’t mean you won’t understand either, right?
7. Here’s an extra long reference. It’s not that relevant but it uses up a lot of words, so just roll with it.
8. This *might* be plagiarism. I won’t tell if you won’t.
9. So, I honestly thought I was making a good argument here, but having read it back, I may have been wrong.
10. I really shouldn’t have picked this question. Can I have marks for perseverance?
11. You can blame whoever it is that’s hogging the book I need from the library for this entire section.
12. If I had that book, I would definitely have been able to express myself more clearly.
13. Why isn’t the word count going down? This is a very very very extremely significant point.
14. Is it even possible to write this many words on this topic? Are you trolling us?
15. Help me. Is there even a point to carrying on when none of it makes any sense?
16. Oh my god, when will it end?
17. So, in conclusion, this might be the worst thing I’ve ever written. I can only apologise.
18. Although, to be fair, if you’ve read this far, well done and thank you.
19. Are you even going to read the bibliography? ARE YOU, THOUGH?
20. You might as well give it a good mark, otherwise we’ve both wasted our time, really.
21. Please don’t fail me. Please?