The 26 Stages of Writing An Essay At University, As Told By Game of Thrones
If you think writing an essay at university is nothing like Game of Thrones, you know nothing.
1. You start off by convincing yourself that you still have loads of time.
2. And becoming annoyed with anyone who implies that you should already have started writing by now.
3. Which is fine until you overhear someone say they’ve already finished theirs.
4. And you realise, while trying to choose the easiest question, that you might have just made a terrible mistake.
5. You go to the library for inspiration but can’t find any of the books you need.
6. And struggle to even write a plan, never mind an introduction.
7. While also getting annoyed with every single person in there.
8. You call your parents for some sympathy but they only tell you that you should’ve started sooner.
9. And you begin to question whether you should really be at university or not.
10. You eventually decide it’s time to get your shit together and arrange a last-minute meeting with your tutor.
11. Which doesn’t help because all they keep asking is why you chose to write about this topic.
12. By the time you feel ready to start writing, your laptop decides it’s time to update.
13. And the only pages you needed on Google Books inevitably become unavailable.
14. Made worse by the fact that the library book you requested still hasn’t been brought back.
15. You overreact to anyone who offers to make you a cuppa.
16. But also to anyone who tells you how well they’re getting on with their essay.
17. And you don’t appreciate any advice suggesting that you should just choose a different question if you’re struggling so much.
18. You try to reference the longest quotations you can find in order to fill up the word limit.
19. But then worry that you’re way past the plagiarism line.
20. You finally finish it, still within the deadline.
21. But when you read through it you’re not even sure it makes any sense.
22. And suddenly realise you still have the bibliography to do.
23. You rush onto campus to hand it in feeling as though it’s the end of the world.
24. And discover that there’s a glaring mistake in the first sentence alone.
25. You consider writing an apology note on the hand-in sheet for what your tutor’s about to read.
26. Until ultimately accepting that there’s nothing more you can do.
Oh, well. Valar Morghulis. 🙈