14 Things Everyone Who Studied Law Will Understand
Everyone who studies Law will tell anyone who’ll listen that we want to fight for the little guy, instigate sweeping reforms to global human rights and make Batman’s quest for justice seem laughable.
But that isn’t always the reality. There are certain things all Law students will experience…
1. People are always saying things like “Ahhh doing Law are we? Well you’ll be a useful one to keep around!”
How strange, you’re the first hilarious person to say that…
2. Trying to balance going out drinking with 9am starts everyday and 12 subjects a term.
Only one way around it…
3. Spending the majority of your loan on brand new textbooks that you definitely need for each of your 12 subjects, no exceptions.
Excuse me while I re-mortgage my parents’ house and work the streets so I can afford semester 1’s reading list. 12 subjects, each requiring the most recent edition? Really?
4. Having to buy tax books which you’ll probably only use once, in your 3 hour exam.
Not 5% of the book will be of any immediate relevance, and because they go out of date virtually every year they have the re-sell value of a used box of tissues. Joy.
5. Sacrificing your personal moral values and opinions in essays in order to get decent marks from your lecturers.
Just make sure you sit on the fence and lean occasionally over to your lecturers side and you will be just dandy. Mortifying.
(By no means an isolated incident). 416 pages, why?
7. When Law starts to find its way into your everyday conversations.
And not just moaning about your course, making little legal in-jokes. You are soon robbed of all anecdotes, spontaneity and personality. Conversations like this become the norm:
Flatmate: “Did you finish my cereal?”
You: “The burden of proof rests on the pursuer”
Flatmate: “But did you?”
You: “That’s privileged – Between me and the fridge.”
8. Getting frustrated because your brain only seems to want to remember the irrelevant legal information.
Knowing that the science over the badger cull is contentious and that it’s illegal to chain an alligator to a fire hydrant in Mississippi is not uncommon. Knowing whether to be a lawyer or not is decidedly less so.
9. Exams asking you to provide definitions for specific terms.
Usually that you’ve never heard of. Enjoy!
10. When Lecturers decide to include Latin terms when asking questions and you have to pretend you understand.
11. Constantly being asked weird questions you don’t have answers to.
What sort of law do you want to go into? Should Scotland be independent? Should the Pistorious trial be televised? Why are you weeping in the corner with no clothes on?
12. Trying to drunkenly diffuse fights on nights out with your legal knowledge.
When you eventually get the chance to go on nights out, the predictable happens and you and/or one of your friends gets into an altercation with the bouncers.
You will, of course, kindly explain that technically said bouncer is guilty of assault and ask to see his credentials. It won’t end well. It never does.
13. “You do Law? Wouldn’t want to get into an argument with you!”
What, and you would otherwise?
14. Your mutual misery meaning that you naturally bond with other Law students.
Well, while you’re in lectures anyway.
But all that hard work will pay off eventually.
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