18 Unavoidable Moments In Your First Year as a Teacher
After years of studying, placements, training and applications you landed your first teaching job. Of course the holidays are good and it’s always rewarding to inspire children, but when did you sign up for being sick on?
You will definitely encounter the following at some point throughout your first year as a teacher. If they haven’t happened yet, then be alert.
1. You will talk solely in acronyms.
PPA, EAL, LAC, SEN, FSM, FML.
2. Stationery will be the most exciting thing in your life.
Saturday trips to Wilkinsons will become a habit.
3. The photocopier will become your enemy.
Do I stack it or clip it? Where is the TA?
4. You’ll feel proud when you outsmart the smart arse child.
You may have won the battle John, but the war is mine.
5. You start talking to everyone you know (including your cat) like they are children in your class.
You’ve got two choices Mr Bubbles, sit on my lap or sit on the counter. Which is the sensible decision?
6. Writing lists, then writing another list.
And adding all the stuff from the first list to your second list to help with a third.
7. You describe people as “hurtful” or “unkind” when they do something to annoy you.
Sorry Dad, thought you were a student then.
8. “Show me students who are at age expectancy right now”
9. You will be heckled by students daily.
10. Lose iPads, find iPads.
“Anyone seen my iPad?”
11. You won’t understand the meaning of progress until your kids have made none.
So many little pink rectangles on target tracker.
Your kids behave like angels because they are being watched. The moment your superior leaves the classroom the chaos is back on.
13. When you realise you’ve not gone to the bathroom all day.
14. You repeatedly try and fail to bond with the kids.
Apparently they don’t watch Pokemon anymore.
15. The first time in the staff room is intimidating.
But you soon learn that you all have two things in common: weekend G&Ts and a contempt for Ofsted.
16. A negative comment to a parent can be rectified with one simple thing.
An old fashioned smile and head tilt.
17. You will spend weeks watching students fail to glue things in.
“That is not straight, Sarah.”
18. But sometimes it’s all worth it.
We need all of that holiday time.