19 Inevitable Moments On Your Drive To Work
Driving to work might seem like the preferable option, but our commutes in the car can be just as painful as a packed train carriage. In fact, they can be much, much worse.
Here are 19 inevitable moments on your drive to work:
1. The ‘when to set off’ dilemma.
Despite leaving every morning at exactly the same time, you will inevitably arrive at work embarrassingly early or horrifically late. Which it’ll be though is anyone’s guess.
2. The battle of the eyelids.
For at least the first 20 minutes of your journey, you’ll have to fight your eyelids for the right to see. Get a coffee in you, pronto.
3. That coffee was a bad choice…
It’s too hot to drink and too awkward to hold, but if you put it down, it will re-decorate your car.
4. …As was breakfast.
”Look Mum… no hands!” doesn’t apply to your morning commute.
5. Then comes the traffic.
Too many people, not enough road.
6. So you reach for the radio.
Don’t bother. Early-morning radio is not the one. Everyone’s far too happy.
7. ”There’s been an incident on the M4.”
I’ve been sitting still for the last 40 minutes. Tell me something I don’t know.
8. Motorbike regret.
Where traffic is involved, it’s either a motorbike or a monster truck to get you in on time.
9. Are the 60 mph signs there just to make people angry?
When you’re moving at an average pace of 7 mph, the warning feels unnecessary.
10. Playing chicken with the petrol gage.
You’ve got 5 miles worth of fuel. Work is 11 miles away. Let’s play some petrol chicken.
11. Commuters with very little chill.
There are people in front of me, sir. Even if you drive right up my ass, you will achieve nothing.
12. Not being let in.
You’ve gone the wrong way, sure. Nobody’s going to believe you, and nobody’s letting you on to that slip-road.
13. Not letting anyone in.
Ha ha! Payback.
14. The ambulance groupies.
There is a special place in hell for people that follow emergency service vehicles. Stop reaping the benefits of other people’s misfortunes.
Get a car.
16. The universal gesture.
17. The passing glare.
They’ve cut out without indicating, and you’re pissed. Words won’t work here, but glaring at them as you drive past most certainly will.
18. And the awkward traffic light.
You timed that very badly. Here’s to two minutes of hoping they didn’t see you and staring directly at the horizon.
You may as well just turn around now – there won’t be any spaces, and if there are, it’ll bankrupt you to use one.