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21 People You Never Want To See In The Uni Library

At uni, if you’ve managed to get out of bed and stay sober, you’re most likely heading to the library for a dreaded study-session. Whilst there, not only is the infuriatingly dull, coma-inducing essay on the industrial revolution wanting to make you scratch your eyes out, but so is every other student in there.
Here are 21 culprits you’ll never want to see again.

1. The person with the tuna sandwich

2. The guy whose phone is constantly vibrating and rattling the desk. 

Don’t make me lose my shit.

3. Anyone who violently bashes their keyboard when typing

4. The social butterfly who arrives, opens a word document and spends the next 45 minutes wandering round mingling like it’s a party

5. Anyone who hasn’t showered recently

Your nostrils burn, you start to dry heave. You are forced to move seats.

6. That person who, on every trip to the toilet or water cooler, cannot manage to walk past without banging into your seat and almost knocking you off

7. The desk hog who spreads out 9 books, 3 folders and hundreds of sheets of paper all over your side of the desk 


8. The person sitting on Facebook when you’re trawling every level looking for a free computer

9. The person in uncontrollable fits of laughter as they watch a YouTube cat montage or something

10. The sleeper who – like the social butterfly – opens a word document but immediately falls asleep

Sorry, you left your home to come here and nap? NO.

11. Anyone who plays music so loudly through their headphones that everyone in the room can hear it.

12. Your pull from the night before

13. First years whose deadlines are nowhere near as important as yours

14. Your worst enemy. That’s it, keep walking

15. The person constantly exhaling angrilly and losing it at their screen

16. And the person who actually started crying

I’m sorry, but there is no sympathy for you here.

17. The PDA couple who has mistaken the library for a dark corner of a nightclub

18. Loud gum chewers

19. That one person in your class who makes it their personal agenda to freak you out about coursework

As you see them anxiously approaching your desk you wonder if there’s enough time to escape

20. Anyone who doesn’t look as shit as you do. 

This is a place for hoodies and sweats, you’re overdressed.

21. The guy who brings his Mac and hooks it up to the computer he sits at. Mate just take an empty desk, you don’t need two screens.

Pretty much everyone in the library is an annoyance. And you feel like you are the only one who doesn’t have a blood-curdling, infuriating habit.

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