12 University Achievements That Are Worth More Than Your Degree
If university was a video game then completing it would be getting your degree. But like all good games, university is full of side quests and secondary achievements that enrich the whole experience that is ‘Uni’.
Here are 12 other achievements you may have completed in your time as a student.
1. Having your song played in a club.
Also known as The Drunken David Guetta, we have all got to the point where we believed we could do a better job than the club DJ and preceded to push our phone in his face with a misspelled song title on it only to see him nod terrified and then continue doing whatever it is DJs actually do.
However, occasionally a full moon rises, the planets align and the DJ actually plays your song, which ironically you end up missing because you spend the entire song running around the club trying to drag your friends to the dancefloor.
2. Not succumbing to the “Freshers Fifteen”.
Some students’ ideas of a healthy diet consists of having ketchup with chips and saying “it’s one of your 5 a day!” But a lot like your degree, the only thing that matters with your diet is what happens in the end, and being able to have three years of unspeakable amounts of alcohol, fast food, microwave meals and Gregg’s breakfasts and still have all your organs intact is a feat in itself.
3. Referencing something correctly.
The two words that strike fear into the hearts of students worldwide: “Harvard referencing”. Every student at some point has had to deal with this unruly beast standing between you and a first class degree, but if you have been able to slay this essay behemoth then you deserve a pat on the back.
4. Successfully printing something in the library.
It seems to be a rule that universities must invest money in the most complex printing systems known to mankind. Ranging from needing a library code and student card to fingerprints and retina scans, these machines try and trip you up at every stage of the printing process, and can quickly become your worst enemy on deadline day.
Successfully using one of these inky torture devices is sometimes more fulfilling than actually completing the work you are printing off.
5. Finding a dissertation topic.
The holy grail of assignments, the dissertation sits quiet for the first two years until it leaps out at you with a brief saying you need to do 10,000 words. But here’s the catch, it doesn’t even give you a question to answer! This leads to weeks of writing pages of possible topics and hypotheses, most of which swiftly get shut down by your lecturer for being too specific or too broad…
However, when you finally find that happy medium and your tutor gives you the go ahead, you can breathe a sigh of relief and know that you’re one step closer to the end. Now you just have to start writing the bloody thing.
6. Not poisoning yourself.
Let’s be honest, university can be summed up as that special time when you are between a totally dependent child and a stand-on-your-own-two-feet adult, this is never more prominent than at meal time. Yes you were able to make it to the shops and actually buy the food yourself, but now comes the dangerous part filled with sharp knives and hot stoves.
Everyone had the dreaded chicken dinner that you dared only try on a few occasions, each time high-fiving yourself for not getting salmonella. Should probably stick to super noodles next time though, it’s a lot less stressful.
7. Not shrinking your clothes. Well, not ALL of them.
Simultaneously your best friend and worst enemy, the dryer means you can wash your favourite shirt and wear it out the same night. But there’s always the fear that when you come to put the still toasty garment on, you’ll find it is two sizes too small.
If you made it through university without a wardrobe full of makeshift crop tops, you deserve a medal.
8. Eating something other than takeaway.
University, a time to be independent and learn to look after yourself, unless of course you live anywhere close to the town centre and its dazzling array of takeout.
Resisting a takeaway is difficult for almost anyone, especially when Domino’s is texting you every day with a new deal, but being able to say no to a pizza and yes to home cooking is a great achievement for any student.
9. Actually paying your bills.
It may be heart wrenching to see all that money go out of your account every month, but without rent you wouldn’t be able to eat sleep and, most importantly, have internet.
Everyone has missed paying bills once, but if the bailiffs aren’t knocking down your door asking for money, count this as an achievement. Oh, and if you got your security deposit back, that’s double points.
10. Not getting arrested.
After nights when you’ve drank like a dehydrated fish, stolen traffic cones and woke up the elderly couple on the corner at stupid o’clock, it’s a miracle you didn’t do anything to get arrested and actually managed to find your way home – even though you never remember how.
11. Not catching anything.
Being smart about sex paid off. Not much else to say about this one but…
12. And not tripping over your robe at graduation.
You will never feel more like a Hogwarts student than you do on graduation day, but despite your robe not being enchanted, it still has a magical ability to get under your feet at any opportunity and embarrass you in front of all your family and friends.
Nothing ruins a graduation photo quite like a face plant.