Being a Student, A-Z
University is the first step into adulthood and can be a stressful time of extreme drunkenness, poverty, insomnia and malnutrition.
So prepare if you’re a Fresher and reflect if you’re a Graduate – let’s get real and follow our old friend the alphabet…
A is for Alcohol – your best and worst friend.
B is for BBQs – the only time students put real effort into cooking.
C is for Cookbook – one of many things you’ll never read but should.
D is for Deadline extensions – you’ll ask but you won’t receive
E is for Exams – even one is too many.
F is for Fire drills – because you came to uni to be woken up and forced into a car park at 4am, right?
G is for (Drinking) Games – Ring of Fire, Never Have I Ever – you’ll master them all
H is for Hangover – self-inflicted illness cured by bacon sandwiches.
I is for Inebriated – because it’s important to have a sophisticated word for “wasted”.
J is for Job – apparently your degree might get you one.
K is for Kitchen – where crockery grows legs and runs away.
L is for Lectures – aka sleepy-daydream time.
M is for Motivation (or lack of) – this exists only in facebook statuses and dramatic, pre-exam speeches.
N is for Noise – roommates having sex or drama students in the Library; uni life is noisy.
O is for Orange Juice – an essential part of every student’s morning.
P is for Procrastinating – a super fancy word for “avoiding your responsibilities”.
Q is for Quitting – “I can’t do this any more I’m quitting Uni” said every student ever.
R is for Referencing – you spend more time of this than your actual assignment
S is for SHOTS – Now? Now!
T is for Two For Tuesday – because you can’t not eat pizza on a Tuesday.
U is for UV paint – something your face will become accustomed to.
V is for Vodka – the medicine to cure life.
W is for “WHY AM I SO POOR!?” – usually said just a week after loan day.
X is for xXxXx – drunken texting wouldn’t be complete without kisses.
Y is for Yolo – an excuse for morons to be morons.
Z is for ZzzZzzZzzZzZ – sleep time, all the time.