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Being a Student, A-Z

University is the first step into adulthood and can be a stressful time of extreme drunkenness, poverty, insomnia and malnutrition.

So prepare if you’re a Fresher and reflect if you’re a Graduate –  let’s get real and follow our old friend the alphabet…



A is for Alcohol – your best and worst friend.

B is for BBQs – the only time students put real effort into cooking.

C is for Cookbook – one of many things you’ll never read but should.

D is for Deadline extensions – you’ll ask but you won’t receive

E is for Exams – even one is too many.

F is for Fire drills – because you came to uni to be woken up and forced into a car park at 4am, right?

G is for (Drinking) Games – Ring of Fire, Never Have I Ever – you’ll master them all

H is for Hangover – self-inflicted illness cured by bacon sandwiches.

I is for Inebriated  – because it’s important to have a sophisticated word for “wasted”.

J is for Job – apparently your degree might get you one.

K is for Kitchen – where crockery grows legs and runs away.

L is for Lectures – aka sleepy-daydream time.

M is for Motivation (or lack of) – this exists only in facebook statuses and dramatic, pre-exam speeches.

N is for Noise – roommates having sex or drama students in the Library; uni life is noisy.

O is for Orange Juice – an essential part of every student’s morning.

P is for Procrastinating – a super fancy word for “avoiding your responsibilities”.

Q is for Quitting – “I can’t do this any more I’m quitting Uni” said every student ever.

R is for Referencing – you spend more time of this than your actual assignment

S is for SHOTS – Now? Now!

T is for Two For Tuesday – because you can’t not eat pizza on a Tuesday.

U is for UV paint – something your face will become accustomed to.

V is for Vodka – the medicine to cure life.

W is for “WHY AM I SO POOR!?” – usually said just a week after loan day.

X is for xXxXx – drunken texting wouldn’t be complete without kisses.

Y is for Yolo – an excuse for morons to be morons.

Z is for ZzzZzzZzzZzZ – sleep time, all the time.

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