The 15 Emotional Stages of Being Single In Your Final Year of University
Being single at university can be great, but let’s not pretend that we don’t all at some point during our final year go through the following stages when we find ourselves alone.
“It’s all fine. I don’t even care. There’s loads of time left to meet the one“, you tell yourself. “Besides, I came here to learn, not to fall in love. Honestly.”
It’s not that you begrudge other people for being in relationships, it’s just that more than ever they seem to be flaunting their love in front of you and it needs to stop immediately. Not least because it’s distracting you from focusing on your dissertation.
3. Mild panic.
You start to become increasingly aware that time is running out to stumble into your soulmate on campus. Cue texting your friends frequently for some moral support because you need some reassurance that it’s not just you.
4. A sudden willingness to go out and get drunk every night.
Because getting drunk is the answer to all your problems, right? And also because clearly if after three years you’ve still not met your future partner in the library they’re obviously just not there.
5. Followed by regret. So much regret.
When you see your one night stand in public pic.twitter.com/k37qo09E62
— Kagiso 💫 (@DarkskinNugget) January 24, 2016
You’re clearly going about this the wrong way. You need a new tactic. Suddenly, you’re swiping right on Tinder more than you usually would and agreeing to go to every event possible, including those academic ones you usually try to get out of.
Caused by making the mistake of doing something like going back to an ex or trying to get with your friend without really knowing why. End result: you’re still single and you’ll never live this down. Ever.
This is the point where you decide that, actually, you don’t care after all. You don’t need to be in a relationship to be happy. In fact, if anything, you’re glad you won’t be tied down when you graduate.
Oh, who are you kidding? It would’ve been so nice to be able to tell your grandchildren that you met the one while you were at uni and show them all your couples graduation photos. Now you’ll just have to watch as other people take them without you. Eurgh.
Desperation doesn’t look good on you and you know it. When did you become this person? It’s the final year stress talking, surely?
You’ve now come to the extreme conclusion that you are going to be alone forever. There are no other fish in the sea. This is it. These people here at uni are the only ones you have to choose from. Forever.
Well, if you’re going to be alone forever you better get a good degree so that you can get a good job and support yourself through thick and thin. Who needs love when you can have money, right?
Maybe you’ve been a little bit dramatic. Sure, it’s upsetting that so many people around you seem to have found their soulmates at uni and you haven’t, but couldn’t that just mean that you haven’t met them yet? Suddenly you have at least one thing to look forward to when it comes to graduate life.
Still, you can’t help but think about how different this all could’ve been and wondering what you did wrong.
15. And finally, optimism.
Until you finally realise that you didn’t do anything wrong at all. You’re about to graduate from university with a degree. A degree. Fuck it, who even cares if you’re in a relationship or not? You’ve got your whole life ahead of you and who knows how many soulmates you’ll meet there?