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15 Things Everyone Doing Dry January Is Tired of Hearing

Giving up alcohol for a month is challenging enough. Please stop making things worse.

1. “But wait, so that shot you did at midnight on New Year’s Eve doesn’t count?”

No. Shush.

2. “And all those drinks after that?”

I said no. Stop trying to ruin this for me.

3. “Didn’t you try this last year?”

Yes. What’s your point?

4. “Didn’t you fail in the first week?”

You should have just started with this.

5. “How long do you think you’ll last this time?”

The whole month, obviously.

6. “Right. Good luck with that.”

7. “Fancy a drink tonight?”

I hate you.

8. “How come you’re doing it?”

My liver and I had a falling out. I’m making amends.

9. “But you can have just one, right?”

That would defeat the point.

10. “I could never give up alcohol.” 

Go to the pub then and leave me alone.



11. “Are you still doing Dry January?”

Yes. Stop smiling.


12. “I was so drunk on Saturday. You missed out.”




13. “We went to that place you’ve always wanted to visit.”

Are you fucking kidding me?

14. “I bet you’re going to go all out on the 1st Feb…”

You have no idea. You’re also not invited.

15. “So, pub?”

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